This might seem a little dark. It's supposed to. If you'd like to add your own tip, please do so in the comments. But let's all please remember to have a little fun with this and be as snarky as humanly possible.
- Tell them to fuck off.
- Hit them with a sack of oranges. Then, before they have a chance to bruise, remind them that they look fine.
- Tell them you'd love to continue chatting, but you've got another chapter to write in your self-help book, How to Fake Hurting and Live the Life You Always Wanted.
- Hug and touch them repeatedly while reminding them not to worry because you're not contagious.
- Start writing. Then mumble, "I knew there was someone I forgot to take off the will."
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